Could it be that good?

As the memories don’t come to me the more my head spins. As the memories are lost and forgotten so is the pain. As the pain is no longer here I lay at peace. Memories bring unwanted feelings and whit no feelings there is no pain. As my soul is no longer mine I live at peace. Whit no regrets, whit no recognition, whit no pain I lay there in peace. As the days go on I lose my friends, my love, my life…. The choice that I made cost me more then I can I handle…. The pain is back!? Whit no memories there is no pain? But I still feel the pain in my chest….. Why won’t it go away? The memories come back to me one by one and the pain fallows. As I live a life not desired I ask my self was it worth it? ......